feeling rather golden

tired once again.

"want to know why you don't like amy? it's because you're scared of anyone who's not dressed like you."

a few thousand feet high in the sky, we were talking about acceptance, love on rebound, and many more. so much heaviness from within.
awake now, slightly dazzled from the dream i had, half smiling, heart aching. this is not good.

5 things I'd like to say to 5 different people

• i used to love you so much and i still do, i don't think it's ever possible to get over that beautiful and yet highly deluded days, i'm so very sorry that i was so ever selfish towards you. always on my mind, always.
• i don't think you know but i do have feelings for you, it's somewhat warped.
• it's regrettable, whatever that had happened between us, i tried and gave you my all, it didn't work out, we're left hanging like dolls on strings. i love you too and will for awhile more to go.
• honestly. go get a life.
• i hope you take it back cos i'm forever tormented by it, please for the sake of humanity. lets all forgive and forget, move on and have fun, you motherfucker.
  

merry christmas.

the end of my paper-filing days!

1) middle-aged women baffles me.
especially this particular one who has an almost devious need and hunger for control over everything she can lay her ugly kaypoh hands on. honestly, she should be working at the SMRT's control stations. she will do a fucking brilliant job.

2) psychologically unsound women aside, lunch was nothing fanciful but yet somewhat warming. the nice people from the NAC gave me a lunch treat peppered with what seemed to be a million times of thank you(s)throughout the meal. i suppose, they do have to thank me. it's been fun working with them again and this is definitely not the last time. good times to come, good times.

3) i'm also unfortunately bleeding to my premature death. BUT, this shall not and will not deter me from kicking some asses this evening. i will press on and press on, i will.

4) a friend's father has just passed away in chicago. although i couldn't be there for the wake and funeral, all my positive vibes are definitely with the gulas. they are people of good hearts and they will make it through this grey episode in life, though tough but certainly possible.

5) my favorite korean american has nicknamed me as christmas special. i can't decide if that's sweet or sarcastic really. what do you do with these damn koreans really? and yes, the said korean has also recently started dating and i'm thrilled and happy. kick ass people deserve kick ass partners. i'm glad.

6) plans plans plans. 5 more months and i'm done and everyone can kiss my ass when i make my way to the chilly wind city.

7) point forms are very very very professional.

8) i better go and honestly, i just saw my payslip and i'm incredibly annoyed with the fact that i've donated $0.50 to CDAC. i refuse!! i do not want to donate any of my money to that ^!%^@!(*& organisation who employs deprived-and-unbelievably-grouchy-black-f

aced women! I HATE CDAC!!! okay, that's all i've got to say.

9) being immature is fun.